A clutter-free mind is closer than you think

The human brain is a machine of deletion. Out of millions of inputs we get every day, only a very small percentage makes it into our conscious mind. For the most part, this is an automatic process. It depends on what we've conditioned our brains to notice.

For our last installment of the "avoiding burnout" series, we'll keep exploring the emotional component of energy.

Imagine this:

Let's say you have a camera. And you go to a party, but you spend the entire party looking through your camera, taking pictures. You can only focus on a few people at the same time.

If you spend the entire party looking at someone who was dancing their heart out, no matter if they were alone or with others, you'd probably say the party was a blast!

If you were looking at someone who sat on the couch, looking uncomfortable, only nodding their head to the music, you'd probably say it was a boring party.

If you were looking at a couple in love, you'd say it was an endearing party.

And if you were looking at someone crying in a corner, you'd say it was tragic.

Yet, all of these things were happening at the same time. The perception you have of the party depends entirely on what you're looking at.

Well, life is exactly like this party.

Energy and Focus

Energy and focus are related because of this exact reason. If you're going through overwhelming times, it's very easy to lose your focus, and let your mind spiral on everything going wrong. On everything stressing you out. On every plan that isn't happening the exact way you expected.

From here on out, exhaustion and burnout are inevitable.

But what if instead, within the mess, you focused on the good things happening? On the stranger who smiled at you on the street, or on how nice the sun is today, or even on how the problems you're having imply you're closer to where you want to be.

Would your experience be different? You can bet it would.

But as we mentioned at the start, focus is mostly unconscious.

Our brains are trained to seek certain things in our experiences. Oftentimes, they've been trained by others: by our parents, teachers, the media, etcetera. And most of the time, what they've taught us to focus on doesn't help us at all.

So how do we re-train our minds?

Seek and you shall find

For now, think of your brain as a search engine.

Our minds find evidence for whatever we ask them, even if it has to make it up.

If you're constantly asking yourself why no one likes you, for example, your brain will search and search until it finds an answer.

But here's the craziest thing: if, instead, you ask yourself how come you're so loved, guess what? Your brain will find answers to that too.

Let's apply this to burnout. If you're constantly seeking the bad and tiring things, or the problems in everything you're doing, you will find them.

But if you're looking for everything your experiences are teaching you, for the accomplishment at the end of all your to-dos, for how cool it is that you get to have these challenges that you never even imagined you'd have the opportunity to face, it all changes.

You see, the answer is in the question.

Ask empowering questions

The easiest way to change what you're focusing on (and what it's making you feel) is to ask better questions.

Here are some I like to use at different points in the day:

• What can I enjoy about this?

• What can I be grateful for?

• What am I learning through this?

• How will I feel when I'm done? Can I feel it now?

• Can I choose to let go of this feeling?

• Can I choose to create a better feeling?

• How can I make this easier for myself?

• How can I do this better next time?

• What story can I tell today?

• Will I laugh about this after it passes?

• Even if everything seems to be going wrong, what good thing happen today?

You can use mine, or make up your questions. When you first start trying to rewire your brain, this will not come naturally.

So for now, start here:

Choose three to five questions you can ask yourself every day. Put them in post-its in your bathroom, on a poster in your closet, or the lock screen on your phone. Put them somewhere you'll see them every day, and make sure you are asking them consistently.

This can be in the morning, to set up your mind for the day, or at night, as you start processing everything you did that day.

If you can actively search for answers every day, that is great. But sometimes, it's also worth it to just ask, and let the day answer.

Put the question in the search engine, and let it give you answers as events unfold.

The more you do this, the more automatic it will become. And before you know it, you'll be asking better questions without thinking about it.

This will allow you to feel better consistently. And feeling better means you'll have more energy throughout the day.

Art Recs

1. Book: Art Matters by Neil Gaiman. I picked this up last week, read it while still at the bookshop, and still bought it because I loved it that much. A must-read for any artist, aspiring or professional. I can see myself referencing this book for the next few years at the least.

2. Album: Stick Season by Noah Kahan: This guy has a way of making music that sounds soft and comforting while tearing you inside out with his lyrics. Not because of sadness, but because of raw emotion.

3. Choreography: "Him" Sam Smith by Kyle Hanagami: I love this because of the story, the production, and the choreography itself. I believe it's a must-watch for any dancer, choreographer, or videographer. I almost guarantee it'll give you chills.

I hope the rest of your week feels like looking at the view after a long climb up a mountain and enjoying it. Like a loved one making you tea because you're sick. Like finishing a good cry and drinking a big glass of water.

-Vale, The Friendly Artist.